When Convincing people that you are normal when you look so what different than others around you can be a challenge in itself. My readers know from previous post it has been about how people look at me, however today I want to focus my attention on having a relationship with a woman. It is hard enough for every day people to accept my wheelchair, and the challenges it presents. When I walk on sidewalks people automatically assume that I need my own separation so much so that some of the people actually stand off to the side and let me pass and than the people whisper to their friends comments like “Oh my god watch out”, or “He’s coming behind us move!” like I'm some kind of military tank or some sort of abnormal weapon. These daily occurrences are hard enough to get through. It is not enough for people to see that I'm typical that I understand what it takes to be committed to someone with everything your willing to do for them, that I’m perfectly stable and normal for a relationship however some people just don’t know how to act around me. When people don't know how to act around me they become extremely courteous, so much so it becomes irritating and overwhelmingly fake. You can only imagine this and if you think dealing with the public perception is hard enough try to picture having the pressure to make it through school, workplace, and many other daily activities and become uniquely challenging when your in a wheelchair like doing dishes. Everything has a unique challenge for me, but having a relationship is not only challenging on me, but partner of the relationship it was going to do a lot more than just your high school boyfriend/girlfriend fling. It got to the point I was such a nice guy but however the girls in high school remained to shallow to understand the depth of me as a person. I could just tell that I was never going to find anyone to truly understand me from girls I often got the “You’re a perfect friend”, “You understand more than most guys”. Having the chance to help out my basketball team gave me a chance to meet some amazing people, but it was not good enough the problem was no girl could see the bigger picture of what love or what committed was. Sadly started to believe it, and was starting to think no woman would be mature enough to see that, Ultimately I found this wonderful girl named Katie and put all the doubt that was building and she inspired me no give up hope and give me a fresh smile and a brighter laugh and like a better attitude towards life because I could turn to her and trust everything was okay because she could understand my worries and there for me not just because she felt that she needed to be a wheelchair advocate, or a volunteer she wanted to be with Logan Buckler that is a fantastic feeling.
The battle isn't over, but as long as you have each other and we can do amazing things together but there are challenges still to come. Katie is outstanding, and I think she is absolutely without question where you can actually handle being with me and honestly. I just the same normal caring and loyal what separates me is the wheelchairs and not the reason that you would resume or think of because of what the wheelchair has taught me a lot about trust and looking deeper inside a person. When you look you see a wheelchair that does divide me, but what really separates me to the run of mill guy is my ability to solve and be able to listen and learn, putting things into prospective there is a lot that we have too deal with like staring he just not understanding what is it is my life and people will be treating me differently but not letting that stop me. It will be an adjustment for Katie but like me you will use to it as a way of life. I will eventually change the mold and people will realize I am no different than the rest of guys with great and wonderful girls like Katie
Drawing any final conclusions I would say I love what Katie has done for me and it only proves that even though I’m in a wheelchair and things are a little more of a challenge everyone finds someone. Good night everyone I have Katie waiting
Peace LOGAN
yeah, baby, i know it's going to be an adjustment. but with you by my side, i know i can handle it. the only issue is how are we going to get you into my house?? can't wait to see you.
ReplyDeletettysoon. XoXo, Katie
"However, besides needing a ramp & a bus or taxi-cab, we are as normal an any other couple. We will still hold hands in public, despite any stares we might receive due to Wink"
ReplyDelete-Love on Wheels, not Meals: Katie's Version
here's that quote you wanted from my blog baby.
XoXo, Katie
Katie, named my wheelchair "Wink" I know she's so cute... thanks sweetheart
ReplyDeleteX.LogAn
Hey Logan,
ReplyDeleteWhat a long and interesting post! I think it's amazing that you found someone who can see past your wheelchair to the person sitting in it. What do you think it is about her that makes her different than everyone else? And Katie, if you're reading this, feel free to respond too. Why is it that you are not intimidated or made uncomfortable by Logan's wheelchair and some of the challenges he faces?
To answer your question, it was Logan. From the beginning he was very open & honest about having CP, his wheelchair (Wink) & the challenges he faced. I had never known anything more than just the name 'Cerebral Palsy' at the time. Looking for a relationship at the time, I wanted to know more about him, not just his wheelchair. The more I learned, the closer we became as friends. I could tell how sincere Logan was in trying to find someone who would understand, which is why CP was what he mostly talked about in the beginning, & I just knew that I wanted to be that person for him. Logan had always made it comfortable for me, teaching me about it, seriously dicussing it, & adding a little humor every now & then.
ReplyDeleteHope that answered your question.
~Katie
It does! Thanks, Katie! :-)
ReplyDelete--Kristen
Katie, just says that I was always open and honest believe me, but if she wouldn't have been just as equally honest with me. I don't think we would have such a great and heathy connection. I'm different there is no way around that, just to forget the wheelchair would be almost impossible, so I don't expect that from anyone though I do think she acknowledges that I have wheelchair (Wink) but she doesn't dwell or making excuses for my wheelchair. Katie was honest with me because that's the only way to be. I think I've had this conversation. Jeff and me personally. he was talking about his wife being a salesman in car sales, I have seen it so many times, so having Katie be so bunt us with me and is accepting to me and that really made us stronger. I don't recall her every saying what "it's like for people in wheelchairs, because I can't speak for everyone. So it was really important that we kept the conversation about ourselves, so for example, she would say "How is it for YOU! Being in a chair". So she made it about us not not focused around the wheelchair. It's not really that she knew so much about it because she will be honest and can tell you that she asked me plenty of questions. I always felt that focused around getting to know me . That was a problem with most the wheelchair gives people are kind of ideas, or you paralyzed? Can you intelligently think? with any relationship I've also had trouble focusing people around me and not the wheelchair itself.
ReplyDeleteI guess that would be the biggest difference. The biggest impact, the biggest influence of Katie not trying to sugarcoat that trying to allow a public investigation and interrogate me, besides it was always about getting to know each other as people and being supportive and it was never about making yourself feel better for being around a wheelchair. Some people try to communicate with me I think because of the way it makes them feel inside. Like they're some kind of hero or volunteer, besides Katie wasn't concerned with that she just wanted support and comfort and I was able to provide that luckily for me.
X.logan
Hey Logan, It's awsome you've found someone to care so deeply for you. Katie you're a beautiful person, inside and out. Life is a gift, and it's wonderful you both see each other for who you are. How did you both meet? It's always great to hear about a love story!
ReplyDelete